What do you see in there? What do you hope to see? A different past? Regret? Someone else's contentment? A missed opportunity? Something better than you got? Dead days? Stare intently, my friend. Go blind looking. Accommodate for nothing. It's done and gone, what you had. What you did. As dark as it is, as twisted as it seems, as regretful as it feels. It's a tree and it will always be a tree.